Week 2 Weigh-In Results!

Ahh, finally Sunday. Though I dislike Sundays because I have to go back to work the next day. I was looking forward to today however because I needed my Weekly Points Allowance to reset! It’s nice seeing those 49 extra points sitting there should I need them! As I said a few days ago this week has been pretty tough and I for one am glad it’s over. Here are my results:

Last WI: 231.6

Week 2: 230.6

Difference: -1 lb

Total Weight Loss: 6.8 lbs

Yes! I’ll take it! I was so happy to show a loss this week when I definitely expected a gain or maintain at the least. Just goes to show you that your WPA is there for a reason. You may not always need or want the points, but even if you do need them the plan still works! My goals for next week are to lose 2 pounds, reach 100% on my ActiveLink more days than not, and take my dog for a walk every day (weather permitting).

I was surprised at what my ActiveLink assessment showed me. I had reached my baseline and exceeded it several times throughout the week. Basically all the days I worked. On Tuesday it said I would have earned 4 Activity Points! That’s insane! Granted, it was my 12 hour day, but still! I didn’t do any extra exercise that day at all. (I was too tired, I had just worked 12 hours dammit!) So far I am pretty impressed with this little gizmo. I don’t think it’s gonna make or break my weight loss, but it is a neat little gadget and a nice tool to gauge accurately where your activity is at.

Speaking of activity, I am only at 25% for the day, as it has been a very lazy sort of day. I reached 61% yesterday just from pet sitting, walking around, cleaning the kitchen etc. I’m getting off my ass right now to dance or do jumping jacks or something to try and raise my % for the day. Might as well get an early start on the weeks goals, right?

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Chicken Broccoli Alfredo for 9 points! Yeah, that’s right. Eff off Lean Cuisine!

No video update this weekend, I apologize. Just couldn’t bring myself to lug out the camera and lights today. I will be posting a video sometime during the week for sure. Want to share a new recipe I came up with today that is delicious and a lot of bang for your PP+ buck!

Until then, keep up the great work!

-T

Week 1 Weigh-In Results!

Ok, so I have officially been back on program for a week now, well actually almost 2 weeks because I’ve been procrastinating this whole week! My first week went smashingly well, here are my stats:

Starting Weight: 237.4

Week 1: 231.6

Difference: -5.8 lbs

Woohoo! I always celebrate when I lose more than 5 pounds in a week because I know that it won’t happen often from here on out. I’m a 1-2 pound per week kinda girl. So first week back on plan I found myself adapting back to healthy eating pretty easily and naturally. I did extremely well on my water thanks to a new filtered water bottle. Those really are key for me. If I buy bottled water and run out I am not drinking water! The filtered bottle makes it simpler for me since I can just fill it up from the tap (in my case from the fridge’s chilled water dispenser) and go on about my business. I have kept my diet pop and tea drinking to a minimum, and in fact didn’t even buy any to keep at home until my mom went out and bought me three 12-packs. Diet A&W (my weakness), Pepsi Max (which did come in handy for Call Of Duty sessions due to the extra caffeine) and diet 7-Up which I haven’t touched. Bless my Mom’s heart but I cannot stand clear diet pop. Which sadly includes my beloved Mt. Dew. When I go on WW I either give it up completely or plan to have some regular Mt. Dew as a splurge.

Back on topic..

I managed to exercise twice last week on my bike, and when I said it kills my knees I wasn’t kidding. Fifteen minutes into my scheduled thirty my left leg is completely numb from the knee down, and my right has this weird pain right behind the knee. So the last half of my session is done in pain/discomfort. Hence only doing it twice instead of my planned three sessions.

So my first week went pretty well if I do say so myself. Second week has been a different story altogether. Woke up Sunday with a sore back (I have had back and mostly neck issues off an on throughout my adult life, a gift from wrestling dogs for 12 years.). Went to work Monday, turned the wrong way and promptly fucked up my neck to boot. So now my lower back is aching constantly and stabbing me when I move the wrong way, and I can’t turn my neck to the left without getting a stabbing/shooting pain that goes down over my right shoulderblade. Oh, then I wrestled a pit bull.

With a bad back.

And a bad neck.

AND I got my arm shredded in the process.

So now let’s take stock. Sore back. Messed up neck. Arm covered in scrapes and seriously deep bruises. HELLO Monday, and fuck you!

I always feel bad when I am hurting. I feel guilty because I have a very physical job and when the other girls (or guy) have to help me out and pick up the slack that’s just not fair to them. So I wanted to take some pain meds and get over this as quickly as possible. But wait – I’m out of pain medication. Ok, no problem – quick call to the Dr’s office and I will get a refill. So I call Monday. Monday night I check with the pharmacy – nothing. Hmm, weird. Normally when I call them in the morning my meds are called in by that evening. I check Tuesday – nothing. Ok, this is kinda weird. Wednesday? Nothing. Time to call my Dr. Come to find out that my doc never got the note so nothing got called in, it simply got overlooked. So I finally got to pick up my medication yesterday (Thursday). You know, right around the time my back/neck flare up is going away.

Needless to say this week has not gone so great. All of my Weekly Points Allowance is toast, and has been since Wednesday. I have been dipping into the leftover Easter candy which is where most of my WPA went. I have today and tomorrow to get through until my WPA renews. I shouldn’t need them but they are a safety net that makes me feel better. I am finally getting things reeled back in from this week. I ate for comfort, seeked out chocolate like it was my job. Didn’t have my staple shredded chicken cooked up (which always saves my ass, dunno why I don’t do it.). But next week is a fresh new week. I will cook up my chicken Sunday and have it throughout the week. I have managed to walk my dog twice this past week, even if it was just 2 blocks. So there’s that. I will build on that next week and shoot for 3 walks weather-permitting. Springtime in Ohio can be tempermental. Yesterday it was 78 degrees. Today it is 40. Go figure.

Trying to keep my head high through injuries and stick with the program. I did alright this past week, but not stellar. Let’s hope it’s enough to show another loss on the scale in a couple of days. I have a feeling that my crappy week paired with the big loss I had last week will result in a maintain or gain this weekend. Only time will tell.

I’ll be back Sunday with an update, and I will try and do my first video update since starting back too!

Alrighty then… wow.

Ok so I did what I said I wasn’t going to do. I said things like:

“It’s different this time around.”

It wasn’t. All a lie. I’ve come to a stark realization. It’s never going to be a “different” go-around. I am going to battle obesity my entire life. That being said lets go into what really happened. I haven’t watched what I’ve eaten for almost a year and have ballooned back up to 237.4 pounds, only 4.6 pounds shy of my all-time highest weight of 242 pounds. Hard to admit but it’s true.

Facepalm.

I did have one big extenuating circumstance that affected my eating, or should I say comfort-eating.

I lost my dog last year. MY man, the favorite (I had two dogs, and yes I admit to playing favorites), the Bubba Lou Doo..

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I lost Watson to cancer 3 days before Christmas 2012. December 21st was touted as the day the world would end, and while humanity didn’t come crumbling to an end that day, my world ended. It started with a limp in the beginning of December. Being a 15 year old yorkie I assumed he injured himself jumping off their bed (a small toddler bed). I took him to work with me and xrays commenced but we didn’t see much except possibly a hairline fracture by his elbow joint. His leg was splinted and I took him home. Over the next week he got progressively more painful until I was ripping the splint off at 1 in the morning because he was so uncomfortable in it.

Something wasn’t right. Dogs with splinted legs can develop a bit of weakness in their affected legs because the splint is essentially what is bearing their weight, so their muscles can atrophy a tiny bit. Most dogs do not walk on their legs immediately after a splint is removed but regain function within a few hours to a few days.

Bubby wasn’t walking on his left front leg 3 days after the splint came off. Something nagged at my gut that I was dealing with something worse than a simple old-age fracture. More xrays then commenced and the truth was finally showing. Evidence of bone tumor at his elbow joint.

How can this be happening? Big dogs get bone tumors, not 8 pound yorkies!

At this point I wasn’t about to put him through an amputation, and I decided it would be best to keep him as comfortable as possible for as long as possible.

Over the next few weeks he steadily declined. Stronger pain medications were prescribed. One day I thought I noticed a head tilt. I tried to be in denial but the vet nurse in me knew his head was tilted. My boss (his vet) confirmed it.

“Oh Tiffy, he’s definitely got a head tilt. He also has strobismus in his eyes.”

The head tilt and strobismus (eyes pointing different directions) meant the cancer was spreading to his brain.

Well that’s not good news. I knew he wasn’t going to be getting better, but I was hoping for a slower progression than this! It was a week or two before Christmas and all I wanted was to get him through the holiday. Throughout all of this he plodded along in his typical Bubby fashion, steadily accepting everything and anything I subjected him to, and continued to eat like a horse (that dog had a great appetite, he got it from me). Nasty medicine? No problem. Being carried outside even though it was insanely painful? That’s ok mom.

It got to the point where he wasn’t able to get comfortable even after his multitude of pain medications. He would lay down on the couch only to jump up a few moments later and try to lay down again, and jump up a minute later. That’s when I knew.

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I scheduled his euthanasia on a Friday when I knew I’d have the next few days off. During the whole experience I went back and forth with my mom about whether or not it was the right decision. She felt it best that he pass at home, naturally. I felt it best he didn’t suffer in excrutiating pain until the cancer completely took over his brain and he seizured to death, or spread to his lungs and he suffocated to death.

If you can’t tell I was a bit passionate about it.

So we went back and forth. I would explain why it was best and she would concede to my opinion, only to ask me the next day:

“Are you sure?”

You don’t do that to someone who is tasked with making THAT decision about their pet. You just don’t.

It got to the point where I actually was second-guessing myself and I finally had to tell her what she was doing, how much it was hurting me and could she please stop it kthx. She did, thank god.

So yes, the day came where I had to take my beloved dog and end his life. End his suffering. The dog who on more than one occasion had literally saved my life when I had not so great thoughts about life and wanted out. My truest, bestest friend in the world from the time I was 15 years old. Yes, I had my dog Lou for half of my entire life, and now I had to let him go.

Upset is an understatement.

The procedure went very smoothly, and finally Watson was at peace. I was fit for a straight-jacket honestly.

I don’t tell this story to make you sad. As hard as it is to put down in words, and it is hard.. I’ve been crying steadily the past oh, 25 minutes, it’s something I needed to do for a couple reasons.

One, it’s cathartic. It helps me heal and boy do I need it, 3+ months have passed and I am no where near healed.

Two, it puts you in touch with my frame of mind over the past several months. I spent the weeks before he died in a food and retail-therapy induced haze. I counted all the blu-ray movies in my tv stand a few weeks back, most of which were purchased in the weeks I was dealing with his declining health.

I have $800.00 worth of Blu-rays sitting on that shelf. Needless to say Bubby and I watched a lot of movies in December. We also both ate a lot of crappy food. Him because hell, he deserved it. And me because I was trying to comfort myself.

I still have one dog, also a yorkie, named Madison. (Maddie, Miss Fidget Foo Doo, Big Bird, Billy Goat, Foo… if you can’t tell my dogs both had about 126 different names)

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She is now 11 and seems to be pretty healthy other than some issues she’s always had. She deserves a healthy owner who can take her for walks, and run and play with her. I want to be that person.

So we start over. WeightWatchers as of this past Monday. I did get a pretty rad exercise bike for Christmas and it hurts my knees like a bitch to use it but I will sit my fat ass on it and pedal for 30 minutes a couple nights a week. That’s the least I can do. It’s finally breaking into Spring here in Siberia   Ohio, so I should be able to take Maddie for those nice walks soon.

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I won’t say this is the last time, or this times different, or any of that other bullshit. Because life happens, and sad stuff sometimes gets thrown your way. Sometimes you’re an emotional wreck and damn it you need some mac & cheese. What matters is that you wipe the cheese sauce off your face and you keep coming back.

-T